A Brand-New Start!: Shameless Selfies & other things...

Hello!

Hope everyone has been enjoying the summer so far! It's hard to believe that we are almost through the month of August! I do have to say, this has been the BEST summer of my life so far- without a doubt. I can honestly say that it would've have been your run of the mill summer, if it weren't for my new found crossfit friends, and my new affinity for tequila, Dr. Mcgillicuddy, and selfies on Instagram (feel free to follow if you'd like- @ama2414). Six months ago, I wouldn't let other people take pictures of me- now I'm taking pictures of myself. and posting them to facebook- where other people can see them- and I'm not embarrassed of them. These pictures remind me that it's okay to be happy- even though I'm no where near my end goal- my face shows where I am right at this moment. I've also noticed that I have very high cheek bones, and I can almost see my collar bones (I know that's a weird thing to want to see, but it's all I've wanted my entire life).

This is the most comfortable I've felt with myself- ever. If you would have asked me in December if I would be out partying and having a good time this summer- I would've answered you No, because more than likely, I'd be at home- napping.

Crossfit and my new found confidence has made me feel more alive. I don't know how to explain it. All I can say is that I feel like a different version of myself. I still have my same characteristics (to an extent) but my attitude toward things has completely changed. I used to cry all the time- for absolutely no reason. I would throw some John Mayer on in my car and just cry all the way home from work- for no reason at all. I haven't done that since starting this journey. Sure, there's been times when I've cried because I was hurt, or couldn't do a box jump, but I haven't cried just for the heck of it. I haven't heard from a certain gentleman (or not such a gentleman) call in over a month- normally I would just get super sad and depressed, and now I'm just fine with it- his loss. I'm pretty fabulous, and if you can't see that, then that sucks- someone else will (hopefully). You have no idea what that feels like (or maybe you do-lol); To wake up happy and even if you have the worst day, and go to bed happy. I can't believe it's taken me 27 years to discover this form of happiness. I do owe a majority of my new found attitude to my crossfit box- RCFBC. We all know- they changed my life. The coaches, the staff, the community, and everything in that box has changed me.

Besides being incredibly happy the past few months, I've been making great progress since breaking my wrist. The past few weeks have showed me that I'm getting stronger- I'm breaking my PRs that I had even prior to the whole wrist incident! Last week-ish, I was able to get 75lbs up for my one rep max clean! That's 10lbs more than I did before the break! That is so crazy to me. I was also able to strict press 65lbs! It may not seem like a lot to most seasoned crossfitters, but being able to get my wrist in a position to clean and press that much weight feels incredibly amazing. Along with the accomplishments, there are defeats. One of the things I've been struggling with as of late, is my Hatch program back-squats. If you don't know about Hatch- just google it- It is basically a squat program that helps you get stronger, and able to squat more weight. So every hatch day, we have to do a certain percentage of our one rep max weight, a certain number of times (it makes sense in real life, I promise). Ever since starting CF, I've had terrible squat form. I'd like to think it's gotten better over the past few months, but I don't know. My body tends to lean forward while squatting, so when you have a bar full of heavy-ass weight on your back, you tend to lean forward more. Last week, I failed on the first of four sets of back squats. I was so mad, and upset, and frustrated with myself. I had squatted the same weight a few times the previous week, no problem, and to fail on the first set was so discouraging. I tried to take a breather, and come back to it, but I couldn't get back up once I did the squat down. Mike told me to go with a lighter weight- and just call that day's back squats a wash. Hilary, one of our fabulous members, and a shadowing coach said something to me that stuck- she said "crossfit humbles you." She is absolutely correct- once you think you can do something- BAM- your body says no, and you have to figure out why. I took that squat day as a loss. Two days later, I did the second day of weights- which were a little lighter, but still close to what I was doing before, and I did it fine. No issues. I don't know- sometimes you have good days- sometimes you have bad days. Thankfully, my good days supersede the bad days!

I started my iron infusions a couple of weeks ago- everything is going well so far. Being in a room full of sick, I mean really sick people, really puts things into perspective for you. My iron deficiency isn't going to kill me- their cancer might. I have never felt more grateful for my problems that I do when I'm in there. Working with cancer patients is a lot different than actually "hanging out" with them while they have their treatment. As much of an inconvenience as it is, I'll take these infusions any day. I have completed 2, and have 6 more to go!

I get to see my favorite physical therapist this week to do a strength test before I go back to my orthopedist. I'm pretty sure everything is status-quo- I still can't do some stuff, but I'm getting stronger, which is awesome. I can't wait to see what he has to say about the ole' wrist! :)

So it's good night for now- I can't wait to see what the next few weeks brings!

-A